Harvard’s Creepy Social Justice Placemats

Knowing that Harvard students would be headed home to their families for Christmas and that liberal brainwashing can be undone by common sense, the campus Office of Equity, Diversity, and Inclusion littered the dining halls with placemats meant to combat any truth bombs the students might encounter at home.

The “Holiday Placemat for Social Justice” prepped students with questions and answers about four controversial issues they might encounter from friends and family members.

First, the subject of widespread student protests. “Why are black students complaining? Shouldn’t they be happy to be in college?

According to the placemat, the proper answer is:

When I hear students expressing their experiences on campus, I don’t hear complaining. Instead I hear young people uplifting a situation that I may not experience. If non-black students get the privilege of that safe environment, I believe that same privilege should be given to all students.

Right, a “safe environment” free from the nastiest of all possible injuries: a conflicting opinion.

The placemat offers responses for other questions, such as why Harvard students were upset about the title of House Master:

Within our cultural and historical context, implying mastery of people feels both inappropriate and ill-founded.

Letting in Syrian refugees could allow terrorists to gain entry into the U.S., your friends might opine.

Oh, no, you uneducated fool. We let in Central American refugees without any trouble. “Racial justice includes welcoming Syrian refugees,” warn the Social Warriors.

What about black men being shot by police? Why didn’t they just obey the officers?

In many incidents that result in the death of a black body in the street, these victims are not breaking the law and are unarmed. With Tamir Rice, he was a 12-year-old boy playing in the park. When the officers pulled up they gave no verbal commands and shot within two seconds of arriving on the scene. He was not breaking any laws; he was given no orders to obey.

As if the case of Tamir Rice was the only one. As if the question does not clearly hint toward the powderkeg that started it all – the death of Michael Brown in Ferguson.

Jasmine Waddell, a freshman dean, liked the placemats. “This is a way to say, ‘You’ve been exposed to a lot of different ideas, and particularly in this moment when there’s a lot of discussion about various topics, you’re going to go home and you may or may not be able to speak the same language,’” Waddell told the Harvard Crimson. “It’s not that you have to believe in what’s on the placemat, but it gives you some tools to be able to have productive conversations.”

You don’t have to believe? Somehow, the diversity office failed to mention that on the placemats.

Embarrassed about making the news, Harvard officials apologized Wednesday. They wrote a letter to students saying they “failed to account for the many viewpoints that exist on our campus on some of the most complex issues we confront as a community and society today.”

In other words: We were dismayed to realize that not everyone has yet bought into our idiotic worldview and we’ll be back next year to try again when the indoctrination has had another 12 months to sink in.

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